A Skillful Listener is a Brilliant Communicator

Listening, is not only the key to effective communication, it is the ace to persuasion. A lot are confused between hearing and listening. Hearing is simply shutting your mouth and letting someone talk. Listening requires concentration so that the brain can process the meaning of the words and sentences. It is also feeling the person through his words. When you listen, you know exactly how to respond. Being brilliant does not mean how good you are at words or ideas. Being brilliant is knowing how, when and what to say to someone whom you want to listen and follow you. Sometimes even a single phrase can make a positive impact and can close a deal. If you don't know how to listen, don't expect that the person will listen back to what you say. Your effort in your long discussion is just a waste plus you end up getting upset and calling the other person, stubborn, ignorant or stupid. No, the other person is not stubborn, or ignorant! You just don't know how to communicate. You are the one who is stupid!


If you put your response in writing don't expect that the person will finish your two-page letter when your first sentence just blew your entire paragraph away. When you are the one who has an intention towards someone, and you want to persuade and not upset that someone then focus on that someone. How? Here are the basic steps.


1. Know your intention. Your intention should convince and not to upset the person (unless making him mad is ur intention)


2. Tell your intention briefly and nicely. Don't talk too much. Too much adjectives will ruin your intentions. It will annoy the recipient and cause him to ignore you.

3. Let the recipient respond to your intention.


4. Listen to the response of your recipient. (Remember the definition of Listening cited in the beginning of the paragraph)


5. Use his response to come up with a strategy on how to convey your intention and how to win the persuasion.


6. If you have to put your response in writing, read back and put yourself into the recipient's shoes and find out if he will want to read or ignore it. And check whether your written efforts will convince the person or upset the person. If you upset the person, it is not his loss but yours. You just successfully ended future chance of communication. REMEMBER, YOU ARE THE ONE WITH THE INTENTION!